Hair Castration...
Monday, August 08, 2005
Reality hit me like an 18 wheeler. Shit happened.
OK... so i get up this mornin, excited and all cause i was gonna sing in school. So woke up extra early to do my hair... not that good a job but nvm. Got to school and Tim did my hair for me. Walau... his flat iron damn power sia... my hair was so damn straight. Ok... so went upstairs... wait outside DA classroom... hopin she wouldnt notice my hair. But Erwyn told me to go LT. AH saved.
Ok so waited inside... feelin pretty anxious. I knew i won't be able to win this year la... I'd settle for 3rd place. Then I, SY and Jarrod went to toilet to change la. So i already put on my jeans and t-shirt, and HE came in. The Mofo who spoiled my day. This Mr tan(i think) came in with a scissors and some other student. THe only words that ran through my mind then was 'Holy Crap'. Then he asked me why hair was so long. Because not short la, stupid. Duh, i didnt really say that. Then he asked SY and Jarrod to go and asked me why i kept it so long. I felt like askin him...Why the stupid questions? So he proceeded to cut that other guy's hair because that guy was a bimbo as well.
After that he let that guy go, then proceeded to destroy me. Still asked me why i kept it long. Because i like it. I aksed if i could keep it just for the perfrmance...but no... the Scum Sucker wouldnt listen. There was no fuckin way he was gonna ruin my hair. So i took it cuttin cm by cm. Little bit at a time... each time askin if that was ok. But in the end, only half was left. Then he wanted to 'thin' my ends. "Dont give me split ends" i said, ruffled my hair and left. Fugly whore. Sat back down in the LT and cried. And cried. Almost 8 motnths it took to grow that. Its like ripping an infant from a mom's womb a month premature. Ok too much but its still bad. I had that as a part of me...as a way to be different. Its like i frikin lost my individuality. So SY and Jarrod sorta patted my shoulders and kinda thing. Then we were asked to wait outside and i still didnt stop. I didnt care if anyone saw me crying...for once. I went to the railing and sobbed sumore. The other two sayin things like... its just hair and it'll grow back but when you've kept something for so long, it hurts to lose it. Heard voiced behind me... askin me stuff. I was surprised Ryan was there and tried to comfort me as well. After a while Went toilet to look at whats left of the hair. My eyes were real red.
I calmed down after a while and after Jarrod, it was my turn. Erwyn and the other MC came in bath stuff. Erwyn was so thick skin...only wear a towel over shorts and shower cap. Yes...he was just bein his idiotic self i guess... and because i wrote in the form that i sang in the shower. Ok, so the crowd was real loud when i walked onstage. Aiyah...reputation from before. Yeah... so i sat on the stool and started. I knew right after i was done with the 1st chorus that i wasnt gonna win anythin. It somehow sounded funny. And i always had to strain for the high part but somehow it didnt come to that. i was screwed. Erwyn and the other MC wore a diff outfit to introduce every performer. Most quite silly la.
So yeah... on top of the blow of my hair being chopped off, i didnt even get third, but i seriously wasnt surprised. Then top 3 performed again, SY got second, but with regards to his encore, he should have gotten 1st. He was so supremely not nervous... danced ridiculously, flirted with Chua, DA, Gan and Goh. And he did the high note perfectly. So later walked to Mac... SY asked if i wanted to come along to watch C&tCF with SH and some ST guys. Went into macs, bought nuggets and sat down. Then he called me and said that the rest didnt wan me to come. So after eatin only 3 nuggets, i left.
I never knew so much of one's self-esteem could be lost in 2 hours. I guess i hit the gound pretty hard. Cant stay down too long... got eng oral on thursday. But i know nobody will ever hear me sing in school for the rest of the year...even if its in toilets or corridors.
Morbidity Exposed
12:08 PM
